Fugly
Did you know?... If you are locked in a completely sealed room, you will die of carbon dioxide poisoning first before you will die of oxygen deprivation.
lovedove1981

Cheezedawg: Hi
Cheezedawg: What's up, cutie?
lovedove1981: Nothin
Cheezedawg: How about you and me gettin' it on?
lovedove1981: I dun think so
Cheezedawg: Hows come?
lovedove1981: cause I dun know u
Cheezedawg: what difference does that make?
lovedove1981: I dun mess around with ppl I dun know
Cheezedawg: My name is Cheeze
Cheezedawg: I'm 26 and have long blonde hair
Cheezedawg: I enjoy mountain biking and drinking Jack Daniels
lovedove1981: quite a combo lol
Cheezedawg: You don't like Jack Daniels?
lovedove1981: Not too much
Cheezedawg: Then what good are you?
Cheezedawg: Probably lousy in the sack too
lovedove1981: Get fucked
Cheezedawg: Ok! What time? Now?
lovedove1981: Not with me asshole
lovedove1981: Go fuck yourself

Cheezedawg: Why are you being so mean to me?
lovedove1981: U started it!
Cheezedawg: No I didn't!
lovedove1981: u said I was bad in bed!
Cheezedawg: Well..are you?
lovedove1981: Fuck off
Cheezedawg: No
lovedove1981: Yes
Cheezedawg: No
lovedove1981: Yes
Cheezedawg: No
lovedove1981: your so stupid
cheezedawg: Yes
lovedove1981: No
Cheezedawg: Ok
Cheezedawg: what do you wanna talk about?
lovedove1981: ???
lovedove1981: Nthing with u

Cheezedawg: Anything? Ok, how about we talk about your ability to suck dicks.
lovedove1981: NO FUCKHEAD! NOTHING! NOT ANYTHING!
Cheezedawg: But I love you.
lovedove1981: Whatever
Cheezedawg: I mean it..
Cheezedawg: I really do.
lovedove1981: Leave me alone!
Cheezedawg: This is the thanks I get?
lovedove1981: For what? Being a jerk?
Cheezedawg: No. For trying to make friends.
lovedove1981: U got a lot to learn
Cheezedawg: About what?
lovedove1981: Everything!
Cheezedawg: I'm so stupid. I can never talk to girls.
lovedove1981: well try being more polite for starters
Cheezedawg: Oh yeah? What do you mean?
lovedove1981: Don't talk about sex
Cheezedawg: People don't like sex?
lovedove1981: yea but get to know them first.
lovedove1981: Then talk about it if both are comfortable with it.

Cheezedawg: Ok. So I should ask them their name first?
lovedove1981: That would help.
Cheezedawg: Ok
Cheezedawg: lets practice.
lovedove1981: no
Cheezedawg: Why?
lovedove1981: Try it on someone else.
Cheezedawg: Whats wrong? I just want some help.
Cheezedawg: come on.
Cheezedawg: Pleeeease?
Cheezedawg: Plese just let me try to be nice. I'm sorry.
lovedove1981: fine.
Cheezedawg: ok. Thank you!
Cheezedawg: I'll start.
Cheezedawg: Hi I am Cheeze! Whats your name?
lovedove1981: Linda.
Cheezedawg: I am very pleased to meet you, Linda!!
lovedove1981: You too
Cheezedawg: Do you think that I am polite?
lovedove1981: So far so good
Cheezedawg: Thank you!
Cheezedawg: Now that we've met...
Cheezedawg: can I put my cock in your cum-dumpster?
lovedove1981: Fuck u
Cheezedawg: What?
Cheezedawg: What's the matter?
lovedove1981: You don't get it, nevermind.
Cheezedawg: I did what you told me to do!
lovedove1981: I said don't talk about sex!
Cheezedawg: You said get to know them first.
Cheezedawg: I learned your name.
lovedove1981: You have to learn more than that!
Cheezedawg: What else?
lovedove1981: Things
Cheezedawg: What things?
Cheezedawg: What else should I do?
lovedove1981: Look, just leave me alone. I have to go talk to someone
Cheezedawg: But I don't want you to go
lovedove1981: Sorry
Cheezedawg: Please stay and help me.
lovedove1981: I can't
Cheezedawg: Can't? ...or won't?
lovedove1981: Both
Cheezedawg: You're so mean. I just want to learn to talk to girls.
Cheezedawg: Im sorry. Will you please help me. I really mean it
lovedove1981: I don't have time to goof off like this I am working
Cheezedawg: this is the reason that I am so depressed all the time
Cheezedawg: i just want to learn to talk to girls
lovedove1981: well youll just scare them away
lovedove1981: no girl will go for that kind of talk

Cheezedawg: Some girls do
Cheezedawg: they like it
lovedove1981: Well go talk to them then. leave me alone
Cheezedawg: Please will you just try once more?
Cheezedawg: let's start over, just one more time.
Cheezedawg: I promise I can do better
Cheezedawg: Please Linda? Don't give up on me like this
Cheezedawg: Here. I'm going to start again
Cheezedawg: Hi there, I know you don't know me
Cheezedawg: but I saw your profile on IM and wondered of you'd like to chat with me.
Cheezedawg: My name is Cheeze, and I am 26.
Cheezedawg: I am from Maryland, and there is a photo on my profile if you'd like to see what I look like.
lovedove1981: that was a little better but you sound old now
Cheezedawg: I understand that you might be busy
Cheezedawg: but I think you're very attractive and would love to chat with you some time.
Cheezedawg: How am I doing?
lovedove1981: good. see, you can be polite if you really try
Cheezedawg: I think I understand now.
Cheezedawg: Assuming that girls will instantly talk to me about sex will get me nowhere.
lovedove1981: thats what i was saying
Cheezedawg: I have to get to know them first.
Cheezedawg: And even then, not all women are going to appriciate that kind of language.
lovedove1981: that's right. i am impressed
Cheezedawg: Thank you. I'm sorry about before.
Cheezedawg: I hope i didn't offend you with any of that vulgar language.
lovedove1981: no. i'm a big girl. I can take it.
lovedove1981: am i talking to the same person?

Cheezedawg: Hey, i know this is kind of forward of me, and that I really don't know you all that well yet..
Cheezedawg: But I really do think you're cute
Cheezedawg: and since we're both in Maryland, and not too far from eachother
Cheezedawg: Do you think you would like to go out sometime?
lovedove1981: hmm I don't think so
Cheezedawg: I understand. It's ok.
lovedove1981: I dont even know your real name
Cheezedawg: Oh, I'm sorry. I should have told you before. It's John.
lovedove1981: hi John
lovedove1981: do you go to salisbury too?

Cheezedawg: Do you mean am I a student there? No.
Cheezedawg: But I do use the library sometimes. It's very nice.
Cheezedawg: I guess it just takes me a little while to get comfortable with someone.
lovedove1981: lol I'll say. you come off as a freak
Cheezedawg: How about this?
Cheezedawg: Maybe we can meet at the library sometime and get some lunch together?
Cheezedawg: I'm really sorry for making such a terrible impression on you at first.
lovedove1981: probably not I have class 8:40 to 5
Cheezedawg: wow, that's a pretty long day.
Cheezedawg: Do you get a break in there at all?
lovedove1981: 12 to 1 i do but I am usually studying
Cheezedawg: How about if I meet you this Wednesday?
lovedove1981: i never ever meet people from the internet
lovedove1981: too many freaks :)

Cheezedawg: That's cool. I understand. I just figured since we both go to the same school and all.
Cheezedawg: It's not so weird when you think of it that way. We're practically neighbors.
Cheezedawg: Maybe I'll see you at the library sometime.
Cheezedawg: That would be a lot less strange for the both of us.
lovedove1981: well if I ever see you don't come up and start talkign to me about sucking cock ok?
Cheezedawg: I'm really sorry. I am a total idiot for talking to you that way.
Cheezedawg: I was really just goofing around
Cheezedawg: I didn't mean any of that. I guess i just have a sick sense of humor, that's all
lovedove1981: yeah you do
lovedove1981: that might be cute if i knew you but saying that to strangers is weird John

Cheezedawg: I know. I'm so bad at talking to girls.
Cheezedawg: I always have been.
Cheezedawg: I guess I'm just shy
Cheezedawg: well maybe i'll see you around school.
lovedove1981: maybe
Cheezedawg: It was nice to meet you.
lovedove1981: you too
Cheezedawg: ok, bye.
lovedove1981: hey
Cheezedawg: Yeah?
lovedove1981: i usually hang out in the Quad on my break
Cheezedawg: well maybe I'll see you there some time then :)
lovedove1981: maybe
lovedove1981: :)

Cheezedawg: I'll bring a hatchet with me and bury it in the back of your skull.
lovedove1981: WHAT!!
Cheezedawg: Yeah, then I'll gonna lick your blood off of it and wipe my tounge on your shirt!
Cheezedawg: Then I'll rape the wound it left!
Cheezedawg: and cum on your fucking brain!
lovedove1981: Fuck you
lovedove1981: Leave me alone or I'll call the cops
Cheezedawg: What?
Cheezedawg: No, wait!
Cheezedawg: That doesn't turn you on?
lovedove1981: NO!!!
Cheezedawg: Girls don't like that either?
lovedove1981: NOOOOO!!!!
Cheezedawg: But I didn't even say anything about sex that time.
Cheezedawg: I was talking about my cock squeezing in between your brain lobes...
lovedove1981: SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!
Cheezedawg: Your eyeball poking in and out from the backforce....
Cheezedawg: My hot love juice squirting on your medula oblongada...
lovedove1981: LEAVE ME ALONE!!!
Cheezedawg: I wanna fuck your brain!
Cheezedawg: So do you still want to have lunch with me?
Cheezedawg: Dammit. I'm sorry. I always screw things up.
Cheezedawg: Dammit. I am such an idiot.
Cheezedawg: Ok. No sex, and no killing. DAMMIT.
Cheezedawg: I'll just meet you on Wednesday anyway.
Cheezedawg: We'll talk more then.
lovedove1981: <User Has Logged Out>
Cheezedawg: hello?

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