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Chinese Whore-O-Scope


Thursday
January 22, 2004



By Kimmy Su
January 2004
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Rat

Ox

Tiger

Rabbit

Dragon

Snake

Horse

Goat

Monkey

Rooster

Dog

Pig
Rat
1900 1912 1924 1936 1948 1960 1972 1984 1996

Important changes will take prace in your career, and you' have to adapt yourself to circumstances. Infrrammatory remarks by boss cause much distress in workplace. Redouble precautions against infectious diseases. Beware this time of gambring with life. Wear two rubber instead of one.

Ox
1901 1913 1925 1937 1949 1961 1973 1985 1997
Make a preparations for adventure that happen today or tomorrow. You either travering or getting your ideas out there. Maybe you speaking in front of group or teaching a crass. It may be scary at first, but you do well. Picture all of class wiff no pants on. Make feel more comfortable and wear no pants too. Always be porite and remember to say preeze and frank you.
Tiger
1902 1914 1926 1938 1950 1962 1974 1986 1998
Mao Tse Tung! Egg Foo Yung! Brown Fried Rice! Sure Tastes Nice!
Rabbit
1903 1915 1927 1939 1951 1963 1975 1987 1999
You feeering very rucky today. Organize time so to diminish occasions of stress. Do some exercise in open air and eat right foods. At work, be more discreet, more dipromatic, and more important, stop acting rike such a dick. Know that it never too rate to question one seff and that you can do better in many a field. You waxing off too much. You going to go brind.
Dragon
1904 1916 1928 1940 1952 1964 1976 1988 2000
A favorabrol crimate for the achievement of your various project, but you must show patience and attentions to detairrls. Your home rife soon becomes unbearabrle. You will soon rean that you have the HIVs. Go to favorite resturaunt and order favorabrle, 'Number 4'.
Snake
1905 1917 1929 1941 1953 1965 1977 1989 2001
Your diner tonight consist of many interesting thing. You have meat. Some vegetabrle. Drink. And afterward.massive heart attack. You die in sleep rater in evening.
Horse
1906 1918 1930 1942 1954 1966 1978 1990 2002
Your present extreme irritabirity not due to a psychic cause but to a dysfunction of erimination system. You got vish-ass. You piss blood out of bottom for freee days and nights. No rereif in sight. So sorry to terll you
Goat
1907 1919 1931 1943 1955 1967 1979 1991 2003
You been sucky sucky and boom boom boom all night rong for two day now. Take a break, whore.
Monkey
1908 1920 1932 1944 1956 1968 1980 1992 2004
You should progress quickry in career if willing to work long hour. You will exert much physicral energy to achieve goal. They don't call it sweat shop for noting, round eye.
Rooster
1909 1921 1933 1945 1957 1969 1981 1993 2005
You being very edgy, irritabrle and depressing. You always acting that way because you are no good rousy annoying prick. Stop being such a crybaby and get a job. You should be happy you not sewing crothes for Kathy Ree rike I am every day, you fucking jerkoff.
Dog
1910 1922 1934 1946 1958 1970 1982 1994 2006
You'll savor the delights of love today. Unfortunateree, delights of love mean jacking off in bathroom stall at office. Roose some weight and maybe actual person of opposite sex will ret you fuck them. You are one gross rooking human being. No wonder your sign is Dog.
Pig
1911 1923 1935 1947 1959 1971 1983 1995 2007
A good day for beginning to improve health and put end to so frequent sinking feerings. Just because your sign is Pig, not to mean that you have to be such fat-ass. You're so fat because you eat too much. This no mystery to anyone. Drinking diet Coke with supersize burger meal not working. Maybe try exercise. Maybe try Riposuction.
 
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