Well hello there
Cheesedog: You're a drama major
Yep. I like acting and the theater.
Cheesedog: Me too. I act like a
jackass all the time.
what are you doing??
Cheesedog: Nothing.... just sittin
Cheesedog: Are you alone?
why you got a plan??
Cheesedog: well, I didn't have one
but I could make one.
Cheesedog: Do YOU have a plan?
but im sure I could come up with one
Cheesedog: Whatta you say we make
we can do that
Cheesedog: What did you have in
Cheesedog: A hummer?
lol no silly
don't mind me
where are you from if i may ask
Cheesedog: I'm from Maryland
im in southern illinois
Cheesedog: No way!
Cheesedog: what part?
Cheesedog: I am near Salisbury,
where is that
Cheesedog: It's on the Eastern Shore,
near the Ocean.
Cheesedog: You're into acting right?
Cheesedog: Do you want to practice
ever hear of a town called jonesboro illinois?
Cheesedog: No, I sure havent
Cheesedog: Is it anything like Mayberry?
Cheesedog: I can do a mean Barney
Cheesedog: check this out
Cheesedog: "Hey Andy.... I'm
gonna run up to Mt. Pilot and get me some Dillsnitch!"
Cheesedog: "AIN'T THAT SWELL
Cheesedog: Thank you.
Cheesedog: and Andy says "Now
Barney.... you know Aunt Bee is gonna have yer hide!"
Cheesedog: Wanna have some fun?
Cheesedog: Ok. I'll dress up like
Cheesedog: And we'll make our own
Andy Griffith Show
Cheesedog: It would be good practice
Cheesedog: ok here we go
Cheesedog: Ok, I'll be Barney Fife
and you can be my girlfriend, Thelma Lou.
Cheesedog: **Walks up the wodden
stars to you rporch and knocks on the front door**
Cheesedog: Knock Knock Knock!
Cheesedog: "Well, it's me, Thelma Lou. Are you ready to go to the
lol this is too strange
Cheesedog: "Huh? What do you mean, darlin?"
Cheesedog: Are you gonna open the door?
One second Barney.
Cheesedog: **paces back and forth on the porch**
Cheesedog: **whistles to himself**
**opens the front door**
Cheesedog: "Well, gollee, Thelma Lou. Don't you look pritty."
Thank you Barney.
Cheesedog: Aww, shucks. You're welcome.
Cheesedog: "We got a little while before the dance. Why don't we
have a seat on the porch swing?"
Cheesedog: **we both sit on the porch swing**
Cheesedog: Offer me some lemonade, whore.
Cheesedog: Oops. I meant, "Hey Thelma, I could sure go for some Lemonade."
You called me a whore asshole
Cheesedog: "Aww, shucks Thelma. I'm sorry."
I dont want to play this anymore. Quit calling me Thelma.
Cheesedog: I didn't mean to type that. I hit the wrong key.
Cheesedog: I'm sorry.
Cheesedog: Ok. I'm sorry.
Cheesedog: Are you ready to start again?
Cheesedog: Alright, here we go.
"Aww, nevermind about that lemonade Thelma. We don't have much time."
Ok Barney. Don't act like a jackass.
Cheesedog: "Yaaawwwnn. Boy, this fresh air sure makes me tired."
Cheesedog: **I stretch real big and put my arm around your sholder.**
**I look at you suspiciously**
Cheesedog: "Thelma, you're so pretty. Can I have a kiss?"
Lol. ok barney.
but just one. we're not married yet.
*closes her eyes and puckers up waiting for a kiss
Cheesedog: **Leans over to kiss you**
*turns her head so that you only get a kiss on the cheek
Cheesedog: What the hell?
"Listen Thelma. I'm getting a little tired of your games"
Cheesedog: "Just because I'm not a tough guy like Andy doesn't mean
I'm not a man."
Cheesedog: "A man with NEEDS"
Cheesedog: **Grips the back of your head and forces your face into my
Cheesedog: "Suck it bitch!"
thats it bye.
Cheesedog: **Slaps you in the face**
Cheesedog: You're not going anywhere, you cock tease!
Cheesedog: I'm tired of you prancin' around, gettin' me all juiced up
all the time, Thelma!
I'm not playing anymore you're an asshole.
Cheesedog: SHUT UP!
Cheesedog: **Rips your dress down, exposing one of your breasts**
Cheesedog: **Stands up real fast!**
Cheesedog: **Trying to get gun belt off**
Cheesedog: **Fumbles with gun trying to get it off the holster**
Cheesedog: **Gun falls on the ground and goes off**
Cheesedog: **Bullet goes through your head**
OH NO! ANDY'S GONNA KILL ME!
What in the hell is the matter with you?
Cheesedog: "NOW I'VE DONE IT!"
Cheesedog: Don't talk.
Cheesedog: Your dead.
Cheesedog: **Well, since nobody's here, I might as well get some of...**
Cheesedog: **of Thelma's dead pussy**
JESUS! WHAT THE FUCK?!?
Cheesedog: **Tastes like formaldahide already...**
Cheesedog: **Tugs at zipper trying to get pants off**
Cheesedog: Shhhh! SHUT the fuck UP!
Cheesedog: Your still dead, ok?
You're a fucking sicko!
Cheesedog: **Whips out a huge black dildo**
Cheesedog: **Fumbles with dildo trying to rub lubrication on it...**
Cheesedog: **Dildo falls on the porch**
Cheesedog: **Cornchips and lint are stuck all over it**
Cheesedog: **puts it inside you**
STOP IT YOU SICK FUCK!
Cheesedog: What's the matter? Does it hurt?
Cheesedog: Well maybe if you'd sweep off your fucking porch once in a
Cheesedog: ...you wouldn't be getting scratched with fucking corchips
right now, you filthy whore!
Cheesedog: **Takes out the dildo and moves it to your mouth**
Cheesedog: **Cracks a few teeth trying to get the dildo to go in smoothly**
Leave me alone you fucking pyscho!
Cheesedog: **Then you wake up!**
Cheesedog: It didn't kill you afterall
Cheesedog: I just winged you. And took off an ear.
Cheesedog: Ok. Now you take over.
Cheesedog: Awww. Come on.
Cheesedog: Let's get the strap-on out of my squad car.
Cheesedog: And you can punish my ass for chipping your teeth.
Cheesedog: Are you there?
Cheesedog: You're not going to tall Andy about this, are you?
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